BALLS TO THE WALL FISHING

The only place to stay current on the latest manic ramblings from the Florida Panhandle.

CHEEKY FLY REELS, THE OFFICIAL REEL OF BALLS TO THE WALL FISHING

Sunday, November 30, 2008

WARREN MILLER'S CHILDREN OF WINTER..

Jesse Ridler had the mac daddy birthday party last night as mom and dad hooked him up with a BIG OL party at the Blue Moose at Beaver Creek, it was basically a runaway tornado with a ton of kids slamming pizza and over salted french fries then guzzling coke after coke to wash it all down...which = crazy fun for the kids. Then off to the latest Warren Miller ski vij, "Children of Winter", where I was suckered in to get a promo picture takin for the "Best Fan" competition. The movie of course got everyone pumped to ski, and we were obliged with another crap pile of snow this morning to ski....Happy Birthday Jess, cool partey!
Where's my Rossi skis?



Cyclocross Superprestige @ Hamme-Zogge 2008

Updated video from a previous post....Sven Nys....the legend, and here is why.



Saturday, November 29, 2008

VAIL SKIING TODAY....

This is no shit...Chris Anthony pic from Vail today, to say the least it was a "surprise" pow day and it was deep. As the afternoon rolled along, more and more terrain opened. First chair 3 & 4, then 2, then Ledges and Minnies top to bottom, it did'nt suck. And it was still dumping when the hill closed.

Thursday, November 27, 2008

AND THE WINNER OF THE FIRST ANNUAL MIKE JANELLE MEMORIAL FROZEN TURKEY TIME TRIAL IS

The first MJMFTTT run ever...Jah-No-Brah brings it!


Official Rules of the Mike Janelle Memorial Frozen Turkey Time Trial.


1. All racers must ride the same bike
2. All racers must finish with the Turkey in the Crate, crossing the
finish line without the bird is a DQ.
3. All racers must drink beer
4. All racers must laugh and scream their asses off watching their friends race
5. Each racer must be responsible for "securing" the Turkey in the Crate as they see fit prior to their run.
6. Each racer gets one and only one run
The 12lb. Jennie-O, which took some big hits and skid marks through the gravel, asphalt and horse shit covered course..was awarded to Jimi M.
4 TIME RAAM CHAMPION, JIMI MORTENSON, took the title of the first event with a blistering time of 1:02 and change. Charlie Brown tried to claim victory but was disqualified when he "tossed his turkey" out of the milk crate a third of the way into his lap, which gave Jimi the outright title. More killer vijeo and pictures once I recover from Turkey Day festivities. The event was a smashing hit, next year look for thousands to be there!


The Championship run...

The Great Turkey Blowout. Charlie Brown "Tossing his Turkey".

Kelli screaming into the finish...bird in tow, trust me.

Jeff P railing the last corner HOT

Dogs were diggin the bird once it was "opened" up

Courtney showed and throwed in the Motorola skinsuit (below)

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

CHECK THIS SICKNESS OUT!

JEEEZ, SO NOW I HAVE TO BUY A DAMN TRACK BIKE ON TOP OF THE REST? AND TRAVEL TO BOULDER ALL YEAR? MIGHT AS WELL JUST MOVE THERE EH? ALL WE NEED NOW IS INDOOR CX. I SEE BARRIERS IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BANKED TURNS...

Submitted by Kris Thompson on Fri, 10/31/2008 - 13:41.
in


The Boulder Velodrome is located at
3550 Frontier Ave, Boulder CO and is planning to open December 1. Currently they are taking registrations for adult leagues. The grand opening date is currently set for December 1!
Details on the velodrome
According to their website, the Boulder Velodrome will be very similar to the
Forest City Velodrome in Canada which as 50 degree banked turns.
Check out some video of the Forest City velodrome
here
More information on the velodrome can be found on their website or by calling 303-CYCLING (303.292.5464)

EVERYONE IS INVITED...

TO COME TO THE EAGLE FAIRGROUNDS TOMORROW MORNING BETWEEN 9-10 AM FOR THE FROZEN TURKEY TIME TRIAL. YOU COULD WIN THIS TURKEY. DON'T ASK QUESTIONS, JUST SHOW UP.

HAPPY AND HEALTHY THANKSGIVING FROM A2B!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

MIKE JANELLE TURKEY CROSS SLATED...

A small group of "us" will be meeting at the
Eagle Fairgrounds Thanksgiving morning between 9-10am to remember Mike J. and have a little fun. Bring your CX or Mountain bike and we will set up a very simple CX course, do a few laps, drink some beer and coffee. Some of us thought this would be a great way to celebrate Mike's great life, so we hope you can come for an hour or two, it's not a race, it's just a fun group ride, so we hope if you can, you will be there.
Bring Beer.
Then we will all go eat and get fat.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

I'M BURNT

Somewhere about ski run 5 or 6 today with the boysk, I realized I have no desire to make another two plus hour drive to the front range to race CX anymore this season. I mean, it's crazy, we drive 2.5 hours, race for 45 minutes, and then turn around and drive home after watching a couple of other races. I'm done, toast, lambasted. I think it's time to enjoy the rest of this great high country fall weather in the forecast, enjoy some long mountain and road rides, ski some, and then go to KC for Nationals...

By the way, JDUBS flew to North Carolina this weekend with Jonathan Baker to chase UCI CX points and he finished 5th today, the dude has arrived for sure. Jonathan Baker was 3rd.

And then I get this in my e-mail, just when it's almost time to shut down the cycling season.
My gawd, Sea Otter will be here before we know it!

Friday, November 21, 2008

THE LATEST CRAZE, THE OSAMA 69ER

The "Osama 69er"

So I gathered myself after my tooth rampage, and I had made arrangements with Jono to go ride the Boneyard today for a lunch break. I met him at the construction site where he is slappin up wood at Camp Cook and he shows up on this "thing" for a mountain bike ride which I immediately dubbed the OSAMA 69ER. Look closely at this piece of work would ya? I mean we're not going on a bike path ride, we are riding up the boneyard and bombing down to the Ice Rink on loose, rutted, rocky single track, and the fucker smokes me on the way down and I'm on my full spenshy semi super juker rig. I guess I have NO skills on this day. Nice ride Jono-brah.

yeah, that's a missing spoke on the Osama 69er

world class stem placement on the Osama 69er

OSAMA 69ER SPECS

FRAME.......FAT CHANCE FOUND IN DUMPSTER BEHIND "THE KIND"
FRONT WHEEL......CAMPY NUETRON
FRONT TIRE.....RECYCLED CYCLOCROSS TIRE CIRCA 1978
TUBES INSTALLED BY THE TOWN DRUNK
BACK WHEEL....35 SPOKES IN 36 HOLE RIM
FORK....IS ACTUALLY AN INDY FAB CX FORK 1.4297 STEERER
SADDLE...BRENNAN STEGE'S SPACESHIP REPLACEMENT SADDLE
BRAKES....WHO THE FUCK NEEDS BRAKES?

AM I THE ONLY ONE.....

Who wants to punch his dentist right in the freakin head everytime he pinches your gall damn lip when he is working on your teeth? I mean, the bastard goes and shoots me full of numbing agent in my jaw, then proceeds to pinch the LIVING SHIT out of my lip ten times while he is working on making bank. My latest dental episode, which was the culmination of six years of misery from ONE tooth, finally brought closure to at first a cracked root, then THREE FUCKING ROOT CANALS (all on the same tooth), finally pulling the rotten thing out of my head, putting in a bridge which included "notching" two perfectly good teeth, then two years later having the bridge fall out, which meant crowning the two previously good teeth and putting in an implant....not exactly what comes to my mind when the word "implant" comes up....$8000 later with no insurance (and that was with a "deal") I think the only implant I should have gotten was a penile implant (not that I need one) and I could have let the fucking tooth rot out of my skull. EIGHT THOUSAND DOLLARS, christ, serve up a filet minon to your kids every night for the next two years on me doc! Might as well just go wipe my ass with hundred dollar bills!I'm going for a Mountain Bike ride and thinking about the two sweet bikes I could have bought with the cash I spent on my implant.

Thursday, November 20, 2008

MTBR REVIEW ROCKS THE SQUIRT LUBE


MTBR REVIEW OF SQUIRT LUBE....A SMASHING HIT!

Glenwood hosts Bicycle Tour of Colorado, 2009


GLENWOOD SPRINGS, Colorado — In June 2009 the Bicycle Tour of Colorado (BTC) will make its mark on Glenwood Springs. Glenwood has been selected as the beginning and ending site for the 2009 seven-day, 500-plus mile route.The tour, the longest in BTC history, will take riders through six of Colorado’s scenic towns, including Hotchkiss, Grand Junction, Montrose, Crested Butte, Buena Vista, and Glenwood Springs. The tour runs from June 21-27.
To see the entire story in the Vail Daily, click here

ROVING REPORTER JONO-BRAH....

THIS JUST CAME IN FROM THE UP VALLEY ROVING CONTRIBUTING REPORTER YOU ALL KNOW AND LOVE....THE GUYS ARE ALREADY ON THE DOGMA PROGRAM WHICH MAKES ME WANT TO BASICALLY THROW A FINGER DOWN MY OWN THROAT AND PUKE, I'LL JUST WAIT UNTIL OUR NEXT DENNY'S TRIP.
The boys before spin class.....yogi in green
Dogma Blogma!!
The bike scene is still strong down in Eagle with these sweet warm days.
Those of us who work late have taken up refuge at Dogma in Edwards
tuesday night at 6 pm. Week 2 of Big John' s spin cycle shows Ryno
"popper"
Mcfarling putting up some big numbers on the Watt meter, Coach Yogurt stopped
by to check on his boy and gave him the thumbs up sign. Courtney
"Jortney" Gregory
was also throwing it down and showing so good numbers until his Jort
pockets got caught
in his big ring. For those of you who don't know what Jorts are, they
are jean shorts cut
so the pockets hang lower than the cut offs. Wattage Cottage Stacy
Lake was maxing out the Watt
Meter as usual with some great runs on the flats and down hills .
Frank Payne also is showing
some impressive numbers as well .He is riding 50 watt higher than his
last year mark , big
improvements Frank. As for me I felt a bit empty as Alex Colemanz the
Indoor Compu-trainer
champion did not show to defend. After reaching his agent on the
phone, come to find out
he was out to dinner with the big Timmers and is waiting for us to get
a little more fitness
before he makes his debute. Congrats to Kim Lake as she made an
appearance even though
she is pregnant, Congrats Stacy and Kim. See you next week 6pm Dogma
in edwards.
Big John

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

DEAR ABBY.......

Dear Abby, I've never written to you before, but I really need your advice. I have suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. I've witnessed the usual signals; the phone rings, but if I answer, the caller hangs up. My wife has been going out with 'the girls' alot recently, although when I ask their names she always says, 'Just some friends from work, you don't know them.' I always try to stay awake to look out for her coming home, but I usually fall asleep. Anyway, I have never approached the subject with my wife. I think deep down I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her. Around midnight, I decided to hide in the garage behind my road & mountain bikes so I could get a good view of the whole street when she arrived home from a night out with 'the girls'. When she got out of the car she was buttoning up her blouse, which was open, and she took her panties out of her purse and slipped them on. It was at that moment, crouching behind my bikes, I noticed a slight crack in the down tube of my Independent Fabrication road bike. Is this something I can fix myself, or should I take it back to the bike shop where I bought it?
Warmest Regards;
A Boulder Roadie

WITH ALL DUE RESPECT....

one sick bastard Above is Dave Hutton (Mutton) from the great wood of the Northwest. Dave and his bud Steve Hall whom he (free) rides quite a bit with, and whom worked Interbike with the SQUIRT crew, claimed to have all this triple top secret shit they ride that only a hand full of folks know about. He sent me pics a while back and I have neglected the poor bastard up untl this point. I figured since he's decked in a SQUIRT jersey and not a ZOOT suit I'd blog em up. So anyway, these guys build all these environmentally friendly trails and then go rip the living shit out of them. I guess when your bike is never touching the ground you arent fuckin the shit up. Cheers mate!
A word of advice, if you are ever in a bar room brawl, hope Dave is on your side....and you know me, I'd never get myself into a situation like that, more than three times a year anyway.

OK OK....SO MAYBE WE DON'T HAVE THE
"WORLDS GREATEST DOWNHILL" IN EAGLE, CO.


Tuesday, November 18, 2008

EXPERTS; WARMING TO CAUSE GLOBAL WATER SHORTAGES BY 2080

HERE ARE TWO VERY REASONABLE SOLUTIONS SHOULD THIS ACTUALLY TAKE PLACE, START CONSERVING NOW PEOPLE, AND IT COMES IN TWO FLAVORS....



Monday, November 17, 2008

THIS AINT GOT SHIT TO DO WITH RIDIN DEM DERE BIKES BUT....

If you have not seen this on the SWOBO blog, well it's just to damn good not to poach. This is what happens when you try and re-direct your ass crack in a new direction.

JESTER, HIPSTER AND PAW HIT THE HILL, DAY ONE.

Initial reaction to a day fit to ride mountain bikes in Eagle, where the dirt is as good as it gets, especially a week before Turkey Day, was to go ride dirt, then we realized it's just about shred season, so we chucked Jonobrah's kids in the car and headed to
A-Basin for some skeetchin. I'm retired from cycling.
Ridlerville

When you're pre-teen, any bump is reason for air, even on the "ribbon of death".
I introduce to you the puke cam.

THE JOURNEY IS OVER, 418 DAYS LATER.


After 418 days on the ‘road’ I have to come clean. We haven’t left Leslie’s parents basement in over a year. The whole blog and picture thing was made up. It was all fabricated off the internet. The stories from the road were made up with the help of Lonely Planet books. All the photos with us in them were photo shopped.There, I now have a clean conscience.On a happier note, Leslie and I just finished riding our bikes around the world. I know that we did ride a train today, but it was in between two riding sections. Where did we celebrate our achievement…McDonald’s of course!! We are both blind to the fact that we just finished a long sought after dream. I would imagine that in a day or two we will realize that we ‘nuked our foundation’ and have a much different life to return to. The beauty of that is the fact that we are much different people. Sometime, somewhere along the way we both changed. It wasn’t a wake up different change (although some mornings it felt like it), it was a gradual change. We knew we would, we just weren’t sure how much. I don’t think either one of us is sure how much we have.Right now our priorities are finding a laundromat, finding some boxes for the bikes and doing a little souvenir shopping. I think that the Laundromat may be the hardest one. The nice thing is we have some clothes that are so worn and smelly that they won’t be getting a ride back home with us.Lisbon isn’t where we thought we would be 416 days ago, or even a month ago. Us being flexible with the weather along with our refusal to ride in the cold brought us here. Not much did go according to our little blueprint we hammered out before we left. I think that our relationship came through the stresses and triumphs with strength and grace. I attribute that to my fellow traveler and partner in crime. I have come to know that wherever I am in the world, I am always home as long as Leslie is at my side (or pulling me through a headwind).
TO FIND THE STORY OF ONE OF THE GREATEST CYCLING ADVENTURES EVER IN THE HISTORY OF MAN AND WOMAN KIND.

Sunday, November 16, 2008

IT'S WELLS AND GOULD IN NEW JERSEY GRAN PRIX OF CYCLOCROSS

Photos: BenRossPhotography.com
Day 2 of the U.S. Gran Prix of Cyclocross Mercer Cup, presented by Knapp's Cyclery, in New Jersey saw Todd Wells and Georgia Gould come out on top of the muddy mountain and take home victories. Maybe the biggest news was defending National Champion Tim Johnson and his "no start" on Sunday after crashing and injuring his knee on day one of the weekend's racing. This was Johnson's first ever "unable to start" in his career.
Johnson with the day 1 Victory missed day 2

Saturday, November 15, 2008

FROM VELO NEWS....


This note from Simeoni...

Hi Lance,I am looking forward to us cycling together side by side in solidarity. You stand testimony in the fight against cancer as I do for the donation of blood.They are two projects of human solidarity that can be joined together. We are adversaries during the race but we can be friends in the fight against suffering. I hope to cycle with you soon and look forward to sport uniting men! See you soon. Have a nice winter, from Filippo
The message was welcomed by Armstrong. Contacted by VeloNews on Friday, Armstrong said he would be pleased to cooperate with Simeoni on charitable projects:


Ok this story can go away now....kumbaya.

LOUISVILLE REC CENTER 35+ OPEN AT "THE BOWL"

HUMILIATED, NO PICTURES, NO STORIES, JUST HUMILIATED.

Friday, November 14, 2008

MEANWHILE, SOUTH OF THE BORDER....

from Velo News/race rpomoter
The La Ruta is off and running with day three under way, Roberto Heras is givin it a rip this year and was 5th after day two. 1.Paolo Montoya (CRC) Economy Rent at Car-Seven Capital 3:52:02 2.Federico Ramírez (CRC) BCR-Pizza Hut at 2:49 finished as the top two after the second stage but Ramirez still holds the overall lead by over 7 minutes.

Meanwhile, SQUIRT Sponored rider Macky Franklin (GIANT) continues his tear through the South America circuit in the U23 ranks in the Copa Chile series. macky ran into some mechanical issues in his last race but still finshed top 5. If you do not know of this kid yet, you will, he's been giving Jay Henry all he can handle the past couple of seasons in the Mountain States Cup races.

Thursday, November 13, 2008

IN MY NEXT LIFE.....

I would like to beg the powers that be, ahead of time, that I be reincarnated in this world as one of these three bicycle saddles, if two are already taken, that is fine, I will take the third one which is left over and be a very happy sole indeed. Trust me, I will smile my days away even though you will not be able to see my smile because it will be buried most of the time....

And then there is this, perhaps the biggest douche ever. I'm sure everyone of you will enjoy this immensely. I can't say I've ever enjoyed a "fight" video more.....

LOST IN SPACE

Sometime last Friday evening, while I slept in my home with the door locked and no possible way for anyone to commandeer my cell phone, aliens somehow found a way to REMOVE my phone number from my cell phone and replace it with a Texas phone number. This was not realized until I began having "issues" with my phone as I drove down to Denver last Saturday morning. No calls were incoming, I could not send text, I could not recieve text and the background pic on my phone had been changed, to which Verizon responded...."we have never heard of this before". To which I replied, of course you have'nt, this is the first time I called you about YOUR security issue. After another 8 or 9 calls, we kind of figured out there was a problem and Verizon agreed to send me a new phone and reprogram it with my old # and information. Soooo, if you texted me with some event (which some of you had), or left me a message, sorry I did not get back to you because aliens somehow stole my phone # and when my service was restored on Tuesday I was barraged with text and phone messages from the previous 4 days. Sorry I missed your Birthday dinner Alex. If you use Verizon's service, watch out for that group of people who follows you around everywhere all day, one of them may steal your phone number.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

MID WINTER CONDITIONS HIT THE HIGH COUNTRY

Thats' right boys and girls, tis the season for skiing in the morning and then getting home in time for an afternoon mountain bike ride. Winter has hit the high country hard and the skiing today at A-Basin was surprisingly good with a few new inches of snow and the mountain skiable from the top. I mean it was freezing dog balls up there today with wind chills around 10, heavy snow and saweeeet turns with nobody there.
some fresh pow at the Basin today, made it worth the trip
Yeah, my life may be full of stress right now and kind of suck, but someone elses sucks worser for surer.

And then this, the DOW plain and simply raping the landscape just west and south of Eagle Ranch so the fucking deer stay out of homeowners yards. The plan is to "clear" wipe open expanses of public land so they can re-seed the area with grass for the deer to eat because Vail Resorts decided to build Eagle Ranch on their old feeding grounds, but we can't ride our bikes or hike out there when these same animals winter in the area because we stress them out. Gee officer, do you think a BUSH HOG destroying wildlife habitat just outside of Eagle Ranch stresses the animals out? Guess who wins today's douche bag award.

WHEN PUMPKINS GET TO DRINKIN A LITTLE TOO MUCH...

It can get pretty messy in a hurry, try and keep em off the Tecate, it will definitely lead to blowing some seed.

AS USUAL, WHEN FACED WITH "CAREER CHOICE" ADVERSITY AND THE TRAMA OF LOSING MY HOME...


I prefer to say "fuck it" and just go skiing for the first time of the year.Better go make sure the scanner at Arapahoe Basin is going to accept my pass on powder days when it starts dumping this season....

Monday, November 10, 2008

THE END IS DESPERATELY NEAR....

The end of the World as I know it
What many of you do not know about me is that I actually sell real estate for a living. Now things have been pretty tough as of late, so tough that I have some MAJOR life changes in my near future. Things are rough for alot of people these days, and when you sell real estate, virtually everything you try to accomplish to help people buy and sell homes is out of your control, and the evil forces of life can create brutal circumstance against you while you try to make a living, not to mention the people you are trying to help. With the recent rash of failed contracts that I have worked on for the last year, it appears my time has come like so many others in this "economy in the shitter". Hence, my future is uncertain as I will be forced to sell my home and pursue other means of securing a career, tough stuff at my ripened old age, but not the end of the world as I always seem to make things work out and find my way to the next chapter. I've heard ECO Transit is paying $12/hr to suck farts out of bus seats. Maybe I'll just rent a studio and write? Of course there is always SQUIRT Lube to keep me moving forward, and I plan to keep the SQUIRT force rolling for many years to come. What does this mean for Addicted to Bicycles? (on the eve of 30,000 hits!) Well, it's here, it aint goin no where, so I'll continue to ride, race and blog. Anyone interested in a 2bd/2bth condo in Eagle, at the base of world class mountain and road biking, and only 15-30 minutes from Vail and Beaver Creek, give me a shout out as I'll be putting my place on the market SOON, and turn key, which means you get most of the furniture and crap as well, I'm going to be traveling light in my next life with a pocket full of cash when I sell this place. If you are looking for a good hand to improve your business, well I'm available.
May all your fates be good ones when we truly hit the bottom of this hole, because to be honest with you folks, we are not even close to the bottom yet. I'm actually quite thankful to be single and free of family right now, as if I was not, boy, it would be really ugly on the rough seas ahead...all I can say is hold on tight and hold on long, it's gonna get crazy! Maybe I'll see some of you guys and gals in the bread line! And hell no, I'm not selling my Indy Fab road bike, ever!
And remember folks, it could always be worse, you could be the poor bastard who is going to be forced to marry Sarah Palin's prego daughter after he slipped one past the goalie! Can you say HOCKEY GRANDMA! With lipstick of course.
I'm Elgee with Addicted to Bicycles and I'm out!

Sunday, November 9, 2008

THE YOUTH MOVEMENT. YANNICK ECKMAN

One of the big stories from the Boulder Cup last weekend was this 14 year old kid pictured above, Yannick Eckman, (and his brother aint no slouch either) who started two minutes behind the men's Cat 3 race and worked his way through nearly 100 riders in that group, including the Freak, and demolished the field. It was zen mojo superjuker like, all though he is a little too green in the shorts to classify as a superjuker....

Taylor Phinney on the other hand was dealt a tougher card in the men's elite field as the Cyclocross suffer gremlins forced a dnf out of this monster of the oval...

SINGLESPEED WORLD CX CHAMPIONSHIPS ARE ON!

Janet Hill Photo

For world cass coverage of the event check out the CX Mag coverage here

Qualifying for the event started with an uphill timetrial in classic Northwest cross conditions as the quest to dethrone (de-golden speedo?)
Barry Wicks (KONA) from the throne has begun inearnest.
Janet Hill Photo