"NO CHOICE" CYCLING...

Most of you out there in the grand world of one geared cycling like to refer to this form of torture as "Singlespeed". I on the other hand have a new moniker and would like to rename this "form" as "no choice" cycling. As I rode last night on this new build of mine, the "no choicer", I was struck by these two mantras going through my head during the entire ride.

1. This is how fast you are going to go no matter how much you like or dislike it.

2. This is how much it is going to hurt no matter how much you like or dislike it.

I had no choice, that is why this is now called the "no choice" class of riding. I like it better than "singlespeed". The term "singlespeed" is so old and tired, and it conjours up a specific image. I am going to re-invent the image as the first known "no choicer".

I actually know Chuck Norris to be a "No Choicer" by birth rite.

This is how I built it up yesterday, with my Travis Brown Big Guy No Choicer Starter Kit.

First and foremost is a good application of Squirt Long Lasting Dry Lube and a chainstay sticker that let's everyone know that I am a "champion" no choicer.

(Note)-be sure to drip Squirt Lube on your carpet if you are a bachelor, it'll give the place some "no choicer" character.

Next up of course are the most comfortable grips on the planet, very important for an old curmudgeon no choicer like myself, got to keep those hands and wrists cozy all ride long. Ergon GX1's are the no choicer's choice. Ritchey WCS Aluminum Bars are the choice of the no choicer, my massive upper body strength as CB says might snap carbon bars like Chuck Norris slicing the earth in half with a fart. Easton EC90 stem someone gave me at the Breck Epic and Elixir Disco brakes along with a Crankbro's headset are other choices of the no choicer.
SC 32 Singlecrown Fork from Maverick, now dirty after ride one is also a no choicer choice. Velocity front wheel and Kenda small blocks, which I hate are also no choicer choices, you take what you get for free however, I had no choice.
I was kind of pissed about Charlie's gear "choice" for me on the new build, because we did indeed have a choice as to what gear to put on the "no choicer". But half way up the first climb I actually was pretty pleased with the choice until my crank arm fell off (yeah, I put the bitch on), then it actually did'nt matter what fucking gear I had on the No Choicer, but that's a story for another day. I'll put it this way, I was pretty damn pleased that I had the insight to bring a multi tool (which I never do) with me and a well charged battery for the night ride.

And now I'm qualified for this mayhem, "no choicers" only.

I also plan on calling the 29er a 58er in the future, as there are two 29 inch wheels on these bikes which totals 58. Hence, my new build is actually a "58er No Choicer"