BALLS TO THE WALL FISHING

The only place to stay current on the latest manic ramblings from the Florida Panhandle.

CHEEKY FLY REELS, THE OFFICIAL REEL OF BALLS TO THE WALL FISHING

Monday, November 30, 2009

TIGER WOODS

And in new developments, this woman, considered armed and dangerous, the infamous Moms Mabley, is wanted in connection to the Wood's case as possibly being the "other" woman involved with the Eye of the Tiger. She was captured here in action just prior to possibly taking a good ol rip at Tiger's SUV at 2:30 in the morning this past weekend after consuming large quantities of ripple with the pro golfer and Fred Sanford. Apparently Moms was pissed at Tiger for changing his "grip" on the club and needed a good old fashioned lesson...
Tiger was last seen here...with full USAF protection and drones taking out paparazzi attempts
And of course there is great danger of losing those endorsements as well...

THAT'S A WRAP ON PULLING TURKEYS

It was Jono Ridler all over the top of the podium at the Frozen Turkey Time Trial in 2009, with a "new" tradition started of the passing of the orange Nokia cell phone. The winner gets his/her name in the non functioning call list and must pass it on to the next year's winner in a showing of true right of passage, kind of like the Stanley Cup. Vij to come when I get a second to do something... Dedicated to Mike Janelle....section of the Beaver Creek bike path.The star of the show, Mike Janelle Junior, both humbling and awesome to have him there on Thursday
Ciro staging and getting ready for his hot lap, until he hung his turkey on a course marker ending his bid...
Uncle Carlos with MJJ and Ciro
The crew starts off Thanksgiving properly, pulling a frozen turkey and hangin with MJJ
Official results
The official Turkey Cam

Thursday, November 26, 2009

HOW WE LOVE THEE JENNIE-O

On this Thanksgiving morning, A2B would like to say screw the turkey which was pardoned by the President, THIS is the most famous turkey in America people. THIS is the turkey that is about to take many journeys around the Eagle Fairgrounds in the name of belly busting fun as we try to tenderize this bird on the asphalt for one lucky winner. THIS Jennie-O has officially been weighed in at just over 12lbs. making it the official MJMFTT bird of 2009. Butterball tested positive for steroids and growth hormone and is now on triple top secret probation.
Happy Thanksgiving from A2B.

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

MISCELLANEOUS RAMBLINGS ABOUT MISCELLANEOUS THINGS...

It's happened, I start a new "seasonal" position today as I begin my battle to shield my home from foreclosure, and it's actually quite a cool title, Concierge at the Beaver Creek Lodge. I some how managed to outwit hundreds of applicants to secure this position and with my other "real" job as a realtor a bit on the slow side for the past 18 months, it's time to make a stand. I actually made the pilgrimage to the Glenwood JC Penney to buy my black suit attire two days ago, and I found it quite refreshing. And it's time to be thankful for some stuff, especially the fact that I'll be towing a frozen turkey around in a parking lot tomorrow morning with a bunch of friends trying to crush their times.

I'm thankful I met Hoover and his owner JK, who is a pretty damn cool chica in Cali.
I'm thankul this was not my arm, but in fact Bobby Diesel's after eating shit at the Single Speed Worlds in Durangelo this summer
I'm thankful assholes can buy steroids online instead of ending up on my blog after searching for them through google.
I'm thankful the BLM has given the Hardscrabble Singletrack Coalition the OK to get signs up on our recognized MTB trails as soon as I get my head out of my ass and get up there with the trail name stickers.And I'm thankful for good friends, bikes, a ski pass, and a new job.
I'm especially thankful that George Bush is not our president anymore even though he rips on a mountain bike.

Happy Thanksgiving from A2B.
More Cowbell to you all.

Monday, November 23, 2009

GREEN MOUNTAIN SPORTS 35+ CAT 4 START ON VIDEO

The end to a very long season, playing in the mud with all the homies, very fun and VERY difficult day for me...and the rest of ya, this was the WRONG day to have dead legs....but it does make for better action on the handle bar cam. 88 starters in this race, insane! Burnsy rocked a top 10 contnuing a very solid season...

Here you go kiddies, I've actualy got my entire for shit race on vij from the handlebars, shit start, shit middle, and shit finish. Hopefully you all find yourselves somewhere in the mix...I'll try and get more of this up later in the week if I can bare watching myself get hammered by you guys anymore....needless to say, it was a blast, and I paid for riding hard up here in Eagle everyday last week due to sweet weather, plus I aint 35 anymore, but I'd do it exactly the same all over again...cheers!
The voice of a battered bike racer
And here is the rest of lap one

Green Mountain Sprts CX 35+ Cat4 Lap One from Larry Grossman on Vimeo.

Sunday, November 22, 2009

GREEN MOUNTAIN SPORTS CX, BRUTALITY ON WHEELS

When I lined it up today with just ten shy of 100 at the start of the 35+ 4 race, the infamous Greg Keller of Mud and Cowbells was retrieving some clothing from the start line he had tossed prior to the start of his race. I called out for him to give us a smile, as he looked like he had just gotten in between Godzilla, Mothra and Rodan during a closed cage death match. When he barely turned his head and looked as if he had never heard of a smile, I knew we were in for something special. If you race cross, you somehow mistakenly pray for conditions and a course like today's Green Mountain Sports Cross in Golden, and it's all fun and games until the whistle blows. Now I'm not one to make excuses, but when the alien space ship appeared in the sky out of no where today on lap three of the four we did, and hit me with the dreaded energy sapping kryptonite ray of mortality, holy shit I almost fell to my knees and cried to the CX gods and begged for mercy. "Please make this stop" I screamed internally as rider after rider passed me. Actually, I was quite surprised my 40lb. mud covered bike did not just fall over from so little forward moving momentum. With that said, of course as soon as I crossed the finish line, 37th, I was happy as a pig in shit and could not wait to line it up again and see the alien space craft one more time...we are sick people us CX racers...

Saturday, November 21, 2009

PSYCHED TO SAY THE LEAST....

photo Greg Keller
On December 5th, 2009, the Colorado State CX Championships will be taking place in Littleton, Colorado at the North Area Athletic Complex (NAAC). I have been asked by Tom Hall, of the hosting club (IC3) and promoter to host the microphone for the racing action and festivities. Needless to say I'm pretty excited at the opportunity. As a LONG time fan of Dave Towle, I've been pretty humble to have the chance and sit in "his" seat several times this CX season, as there is truly only one voice of CX, and that is Dave. That said, as I try to polish and refine my own style behind the mic, announcing at the Colorado Veldrijden Crusade State Championship race will be right up there on the list of events I would ever want to call the action at...and of course, there is racing in Golden tomorrow as well where I can hopefully line it up one more time this CX season...

Friday, November 20, 2009

IT AINT OVER TILL IT'S OVER


We continue to hang on down here in Eagle as just the last bastions of sanity remain down low here for the mountain biking community. While everyone else is getting fired up about the opening of Vail Mountain, where you will be delighted to find pay parking on the frontage road in the very near future, why the hell not, you have no choice...we are still milking the hell out of the cycling season on the dirt/snow. Just watch out for some of those snowy patches, they will bite you right in your arse...race course backwards below.

SECOND ANNUAL MIKE JANELLE MEMORIAL FROZEN TURKEY TIME TRIAL, 9AM THANKSGIVING MORNING, EAGLE FAIRGROUNDS

Last Thanksgiving morning, at the Eagle Fairgrounds, a group of us got together to remember our good friend Mike Janelle a year after his unfortunate passing. What ensued for the next hour was just a flat out pisser of a time, Janelle style. Well, we are doing it again and encourage all of you to come and laugh your ass off and try and win a frozen turkey by negotiating a sixty second course, all of us on the Elgee 1986 Rockhopper cruiser bike (no need to bring your own ride), drink beer, and basically try not to pee yourself from laughing so hard watching the action. It's free, bring a couple of brews, and we should be done by 11am-noon so you can get home and stuff yourself. Start the holiday season off with some big fun and friends...see you there, 9am.

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

I WOULD LIKE TO CX RACE THROUGH PUMPKINS

This appears nothing short of furkin killer.
Can one of the front range promoters please arrange a race like this, it just seems like some off the wall fun, oops, did I say fun?

ARAPAHOE BASIN UNDER THE METEOR SHOWER...

Super sick shot of Arapahoe Basin last night under the Meteor shower from Alex McGregor, he did not capture any meteors, but this is one of my all time fav pics of a place I spent the majority of my skiing life....killa.

Monday, November 16, 2009

SARAH PALIN RELEASES "GOING DOUCHE BAG".

VOTE FOR YOUR FAVORITE DOUCHE BAGS HERE
this is a fabricated story
"Going Douche Bag" is sure to capture our imaginations with the wonderful tails of how the former Governor actually never hunted, shot a gun, fished, went to a hockey game as a hockey mom (all though if she had, old Levi may not have slipped one past the Goalie in the parking lot), or actually was able to tell if it was Rushia or Scotland she was gazing at while her daughter was repelling out of her bedroom window on a couple of dirty sheets tied together to chase the American Dream.
Palin is back out there, and about to remind us of what a clown she is...start banging those nails in your own coffin Sarah...

CX IS THE SHIZZLE, BUT IT AINT ALL THE SHIZZLE,

McKenzie Gulch hike started like this.... With good "company" in town this weekend which included Hoover the Wonder Dog, it was time for some good ol trail time in the snowfall up here in Eagle instead of braving the death defying drive to the front range to go race Cross. Big snow left us playing in the woods up here and once again left me realizing more than ever that good company, foul weather, and a way cool pooch can bring some damn good experience and laughs along instead of suffering on I-70 for 5-6 hours and then puking on my CX bike, don't get me wrong, there is nothing wrong with puking on the CX bike, but there are other well balanced options out there in Elgee's world.....did I hear someone say Ginser?
And ended like this...
Jean and Hoover enjoy some freshies...
Hoov waits for a food fumble...

Saturday, November 14, 2009

SUPPORT JAKE WELL'S PUSH TO NATIONALS..

Jake Wells (JDubs) has started his push towards a National Championship run in Bend, Oregon this year, mid December. As you know Jake is the Working Man's CX Hero and does not have a big time title sponsor to foot the bill for him and his mechanic to get there. Makaya Massage and Body Work is offering this killer deal to help get Jake there by raising some funds, and of course any big timer sponsor is welcome as well...help the cat out, he deserves it. What up Mafia?

Thursday, November 12, 2009

BONEYARD, EAGLE, COLORADO, TRIPLE TOP SECRET ELGEE A2B SINGLESPEED TRAINING

I have never quite grasped the SS phenom over the years. with that said, I have jumped on a couple and had enough fun to wet some panties on a SS. I've got my own SS program that I have secretly been on for a couple of seasons (gawd only knows we can't get stronger without it) and now is the time to reveal this amazingly intricate routine. I do this ride once every week or two. First, I head to the Boneyard on my GEARED bike. I then shift the bike into ONE gear, whatever gear I feel like riding in that day depending on what I'm trying to accomplish and how I feel that day. Being able to PICK which SS gear I would LIKE to ride in on that day, instead of having to hit the bike shop and change cogs. I have a tendency to turn off my ears when the gear ratio talk starts at the shop or at races, it gives me an anxiety attack actually. Okay, so I choose my gear, and then I actually STAY in that gear for the entire ride, it's an amazing concept I know, and I'm on a heavier geared bike as opposed to a SS so it's TWICE the training ride. The bigger the gear I choose on a particular day, the more baggy and torn the clothes I choose to wear to go along with it. It's just such a loving program. Here is yesterday SS training ride, at the Bonetard of course.

Old Race Course descent off of the Boneyards climb in Eagle, Colorado
it's a ripper


And the climb up the Boneyard, just good clean steady middle ring climbing.




Wednesday, November 11, 2009

HAPPY VETERANS DAY FROM A2B

And never mind about the fluffer seat which is slightly out of alignment, this day is about the symbolism of that flag, what it stands for and those who have served and do serve in the name of freedom, and not just here in the USA, as my father served in the Royal Canadian Airforce in his youth. Thank you to all of you from A2B for keeping us free and allowing me the ability to post my thoughts, whether agreeable or not without recourse that is lifestyle restricting. A2B thanks you.

Monday, November 9, 2009

WHAT DID THE REST OF THE UNEMPLOYED DOGS DO TODAY?

I had to go do this....after watching the "Yoder" cam lately, I had to pull my GoPro Helmet cam back out and try out the bar mount that it came with...on Wolverton/Pipeline.., let's go rip a hot lap.

Now you get to participate as an A2B reader, pick a song on the green play list right next to this post and let er rip to the video....

And then finish up your ride down Pipeline

THE VIEW FROM THE ANNOUNCER'S BOOTH..

Alpha Cross was held in Brighton yesterday at a killer venue. Racers paid the CX price and suffered through 45 or 60 minutes of pure suffering and fun on a unique course. Racer's provided some hot action to announce in many categories and Alpha put on a damn good show.
the view from the announcer's booth as racers start the plunge down to the back portion of the course from the top of the "mound".

Saturday, November 7, 2009

SHOOTING AT THE SANDBAR IN VAIL TONIGHT?

Below, the douche bag who shot up the Sandbar in West Vail last night, Richard Mareau. Now we get to pay to feed and defend this asshole.
Dominique Taylor Photo
One dead, two injured. People, go ride your bikes. You live in VAIL. More details when they come in. Sounds like a fight broke out and some douche bag went off, I hope it's no one we know. The shooter has been identified as Richard Moreua, 63, of Vail, a person Vail police have had issues with before apparently.

And check this out, interview from 07 with "Rossi", "takes meds every four hours" I think he missed a couple of doses..could'nt see that one coming.

THESE DAYS ARE MUCH MORE IMPORTANT...

There is something almost unfair about being able to jump on the road bike and go ride through this from my front door. Glenwood Canyon is absolutely one of my favorite rides and one of the most incredible spots in this country, especially when it's warm enough to actually sweat while you are riding in November. This roughly 70 mile round trip to Glenwood and back through the 16 mile canyon is boneriffic.
Glenwood Hot Springs, always hoppin, all year round.
Did you know this?
Portions of what was the most expensive fifteen miles of Interstate highway ever built at the time, completed in 1993. Remember when this was a windy two laner prior to that?
cmon


This was such a better choice than driving five hours roundtrip to Boulder to race CX today, race, finish in the same spot I always finish in, then watch all my friends finish in the same place they usually finish in, and then realize nobody actually cares where I finished, including myself. It's kind of tired. See you down there tomorrow, and everyone should finish in a new place just to mix it up a little.

ALPHA CROSS TOMORROW IN BRIGHTON

The more of you that come to race, the more I have to heckle while announcing, see you there.

Friday, November 6, 2009

SOME THINGS I MISSED...

Not only the racing was a hooter last weekend, as I again was able to crash Bobby Diesel's family scene, which was nothing short of epicamous, but we also managed some shenanigans along the way, imagine that.
Oskar Blues Brewery (step it up a bit on the size of the French Fry order would ya?) in Longmont was rippin busy on Friday night, and after two TenFidy draws, a Grodon draw, and a number of PBRs, it was off to the Xilinx course the night before to go do hot laps at midnight in the mud, it was like a night race in Portland.
And of course what would Halloween be without a stroll through the Diesel hood without Mini UPS man and a vampire...

MAJOR NIDAL MALIK HASAN MOTIVE FOR RAMPAGE

Need I say more, A2B cracks another one....

And now our tax dollars have to heal and feed this guy, wonderful. I'll pull the plug on this asshole for a nickel, I just saved the taxpayers millions. Brilliant!

Thursday, November 5, 2009

LET'S MIX IT UP A HAIR...CX AND HIDDEN GEMS






Above is more vij highlight from last weekend, if you've got the balls, strap on the helmet and line it up in the 35 open race.

Then there is this little controversy, the Hidden Gems Wilderness proposal. I seem to have gotten myself somehow sucked into another issue here in the Eagle locale. I was contacted yesterday by the Vail Daily, one of our local papers, the other being the Vail Mountaineer. Sarah Mausolf from the Daily contacted me and said she wanted to talk to me about the Hardscrabble Singletrack Coalition, a grassroots group I have formed to protect, preserve and be stewards of the existing trail network on BLM land just west of Eagle. We've got an amazing group of folks here in the Eagle Valley who take great pride in our existing trail network on public lands and I thought it might be a good idea to loosely formalize this into a coalition to get some projects done for the better of the system. top priority for this group is to get the trail network properly signed. This would make the area much more user friendly and potentially bring more mountain bikers to ride in Eagle without the threat of getting confused and "misdirected" on the trail system. This of course will potentially lead to more $$$ being spent in Eagle because we will have a killer trail system that is easy to get around. The Hardscrabble Singletrack Coalition would also be responsible for the maintaining of and stewardship of this area. Ultimately we want to be incorporated as a non-profit which will help us get funding for projects through the BLM, IMBA and other trail/mountain bike related agencies. THAT is the ultimate goal of the coalition. We have already been able to raise several hundred dollars through our first fundraiser at Yeti's Grind in Eagle as well as trail map donations at the Mountain Pedaler Bike shop in Eagle. People like this idea...

Of course, while talking to Sarah at the Vail Daily, Sarah Mausolf quickly turned the conversation to the Hidden Gems Wilderness issue, which I really did not want to talk about but obliged her request. I was on the phone to talk about the Hardscrabble Singletrack Coalition, but it was clear Sarah had a different agenda as "news" media typically do. She asked me for my stance and if this was the stance of the HSC. I told her I spoke for myself and on behalf of the coalition and that Hidden Gems is not a black and white issue. To be perfectly honest I call bullshit on an advocacy group rising up from their own seed to try and take my use rights away on 400,000 acres of public land. I could rant forever about this but Sarah asked me what my top two reasons for opposition were and I responded...

1. I'm concerned about the precedent trying to be set with this proposal. This proposal covers fifteen different areas of the Colorado High Country. EACH of these areas need to be studied more carefully. Why in the hell I've got to fight to keep myself "included" as a user in these areas I have always been able to ride a mountain bike on is beyond me. Who gave this "group" the right to make me fight for what is already mine to use as a tax payer here in Colorado and the USA? NO one has the right to tell the rest of us who is included and excluded from PUBLIC land usage.

2. First of all, I do not have a problem with our horseback riding contingent, period. However, Hidden Gems if passed will allow horseback use in these areas. Are you going to sit there and tell me, while looking me in the eye, that a 2000 lb. horse with a 150lb rider on it's back, on STEEL horseshoes does not do more damage to the high country trail system than a 150 lb mountain biker on inflated RUBBER tires? Must I show you the rusty thrown horseshoes and the nails that hold those rusty things on that I've seen and picked out of my tires over the years off of BLM land? IN OTHERWORDS, IF YOU SAY YES TO HORSEBACK, YOU BETTER SAY YES TO MOUNTAIN BIKE. This needs to be discussed in detail, about each of the proposed 15 areas. Mountain Bikers, do not sit back and take it, make your voice heard. This is just one small corner of the big picture and argument.

Red Table Mountain is one of the largest proposed areas for restrictions, it sits just west and south of Gypsum, Colorado. If you got to the Hidden Gems propoganda site, you will see this quote about that area...
"This large proposed Wilderness Area has had little historical disturbance and retains an excellent remote and primitive character."

To which I reply, why the FUCK does this need to be taken away from the responsible users of this parcel, myself included.
I've got to tell you folks, this entire thing has me almost running some Republican blood, but not really.

Wednesday, November 4, 2009

BOULDER CUP 2009 MEN'S OPEN, BOULDER RESERVOIR

PHOTOS FROM EDDIE CLARK PHOTO-CYCLES.COM

I'm in the CX Pain Cave at the Rez...Eddie Clark is a contributor to the pages of Mountain Flyer Mag, both in photo and print. Some shots I poached, check out some smokin pics from the weekend and the race recaps at Mountain Flyer Mag.

Robin Eckman bunny hops the 18 inchers...kiddin me right?

When the blizzard hit at Boulder Cyclesport Rez race..Shawn Lorte is another contributor at Mountain Flyer, a couple of pics..

The pits were super busy at the Blue Sky Velo Cup on Saturday at Xilinx, some racers changing bikes every half lap
Busy start to the men's elite race as well

And of course some Vij....Xilinx 35 open and 35+4's