Tuesday, March 8, 2016
TURNING LEMONS INTO LEMONADE, LEZYNE, THE BANE OF MY EXISTENCE....
Somewhere about and around ten years ago, when I lived in Eagle, Colorado, and my local bike shop was the Mountain Pedaler, where I occasionally worked, if you needed something your balls were basically tied to the cutting board when it came to buying exactly what you needed. You were at the mercy of what was available in the random piles of stuff strewn around the bike shop and what was recommended by Charlie Brown who was the guy who ran the shop. Whatever was available was always the latest and greatest according to somebody and when the Lezyne floor pumps came out it was absolutely the greatest piece of equipment ever invented by man at the time, so I bought one. That fucking thing was the bane of my cycling existence for the past ten years or there about. A couple of days ago I had the guys at Campus Cycles in Lakewood, where I now do all of my cycling related business, order me a Silca chuck to put an end to the madness, the chuck was there in two days. This would have taken a couple of weeks at my old mountain shop. I was happy.
What happened next was one of the most incredible experiences of my cycling life and world. The joy I took in cutting that piece of crap Lezyne head off of that pump was beyond epic, let's just say it would have been comparable to Florida State winning 10 National Football Championships in a row. That piece of my old pump had been responsible for pulling cores out of presta valves for ten years, not "turning" freely and smooth to get that fucker on and off the presta valve (it was threaded to do so) and now it laid there dead on my work bench. Great Joy. Attaching the new Silca chuck took a little bit of heat and grease but I got er done, and presto! I now have the world's greatest presta valve pump ever invented. Life is all in balance once again and the stars are aligned and I can keep the old Lezyne head in a prominent position on my garage work bench so everytime I see it I can flip it a bird and tell it to "fuck off" which will bring me great pleasure. What a great day.
Die you Bastard.